When: 16/03/2012

Pink Panther, Double Espresso, Boy from Wanthaggi, Aimz, Lowbanger and Grant – 6 Aussies, 1 cracking Chalet, 2 boarders, 2 expert skiers, 2 battlers and 400km of ski runs on our door step. Life was pretty good for a week in La Tzoumaz.
Turns out La Tzoumaz is named after the word ‘tzoumer’ which means taking a break…ahhh the perfect place for our week in the snow. La Tzoumaz is 2hrs from Geneva and sits in the Swiss Alps, part of the Four Valley’s ski area which includes the famous Verbier ski resort. It is touted to have direct access to some of the best skiing in Europe – not too shabby!

We stayed in Chalet Mandalay courtesy of Justin’s very generous boss who built the property around 2 years ago. With 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and every mod con and kitchen utensil that opened and shut (including a sauna and drying rack for our boots), we certainly weren’t roughing it. A 2min drive to the chair lift made ski access ridiculously easy and on top of that, we were treated to 5 star views across the valley. Just magic.In an attempt to find our ski legs with minimal carnage, day 1 we stayed local and played on the slopes between La Tzoumaz and Savoleyres. Perfect way to ease our way in. The 2nd day on the slopes was a big day of nearly 8 hours skiing. Visibility wasn’t great and unfortunately got worse as the day progressed. The last run of the day we were practically blind being unable to see one pole to the next. A tad scary when you’re not sure which way is down! The upside of the poor visibility was the enormous dump of snow that was heading our way…power of collective prayers?!

Despite the mammoth day, clearly we didn’t go hard enough because the energy reserves were well and truly stocked for the snowball fight to end all fights when we got home. Cheeky Fi sent a few well aimed balls at the boys as they headed off to get pizza for dinner. Female intuition saw Amy and I join the fight without the need to call for reinforcements. And so ensued a flurry of missiles from the balcony only ending when we realized the pizza might be getting cold. We declared a female victory given the boys felt the need to ask for a free shot at each of us because they couldn’t actually make contact. Ah the sweet smell of success!

When the snow came, it arrived in spades. We were treated to a god-sent dump of around 15cm of snow overnight. The area was completely transformed into a Winter Wonderland with our barometer  (beer on the balcony) showing us every few minutes just how heavily the snow was coming down. A shriek of delight rang out from the lounge room when the snow swallowed up the label. Opening the curtains in the morning was like being 5 years old on Christmas Day again. Fresh powder everywhere! Justin and I grinned, knowing we wouldn’t hurt ourselves falling over today. Shame our bodies were just a bit beaten to take to the slopes for the 3rd day in a row.

Luckily the next day provided equally good conditions. Freshly groomed slopes on a backdrop of blue skies and bright sunshine – heaven on earth. We were up and at ’em by 8.45am beating the locals onto the slopes. Soaring down with the wind in our neck gaiters, whooping with delight – pure joy. If we’d been golden retrievers our ears would’ve been flapping, tongues hanging out and tails doing circle work with unabated enthusiasm.

Unfortunately that unabated enthusiasm manifested itself with a ‘I’m invincible’ mentality. Oh dear. After oohing and aahhing at the sensational panoramic view from Mont Fort, one of the highest points in the region at 3300m, a little voice inside my head told me to ski down with the far more experienced group rather than take the safe option – the cable car. With moguls up to my thighs and a drop which looked every bit vertical I’m not sure why I listened to that little voice. Next time you can be sure I’ll shove a cork in it until it’s completely suffocated! The good news is I only fell once, losing my ski, ending up spread-eagled and taking a good 10mins to get on my feet again. The bad news is, I was so knackered once I got to the bottom that my legs had the shakes and I was almost ready to call it a day. It was 11am.

I soldiered on and boy am I glad I did because I would’ve missed the most extraordinary spot for lunch – Cabane Mt-Fort. After stalking some Germans we secured pole position of the lunch tables with front row seats to a view that was nothing short of jaw dropping. I won’t even try to describe it as it won’t do it justice. Let’s just say lunch included – a raspberry tart that Aimz will continue to dream about for many years to come, an off-piste display of gutsy skiers / boarders dropping off the side of the mountain, cheese fondue, mouth watering lasagna, killer apple tart and flawless coffee. Very happy little campers! Even the brash Aussie yelling at me to sit down couldn’t dampen the mood. Benny put him back in his place later that day with a verbal onslaught that made us all very proud.

Over the course of the week we spent 4 glorious days on the slopes (5 for hardcore BM), an afternoon in quaint Iserables where we helped the cafe owner make budget for the year and a day in Verbier where we basked in the sun over beers and said g’day to Sir Richard Branson jogging past. The rest of the time was spent eating like Kings in our Chalet, drinking our weary bodies to sleep and icing war wounds from the slopes. Sheer bliss!!

Top 10:
1. It can take 4 people to lock a door – the boy from Wanthagi being the ultimate door whisperer
2. Never embark on a snowball fight with 3 females with something to prove
3. 60 pounds for 3 takeaway pizza’s hurts but is not unusual in Switzerland
4. Stacking on the slopes is far better if someone is there to see it
5. It’s possible to fall spread-eagle style with bum in the air every time
6. Telling people you don’t like a nick-name will ensure it sticks…Grant!
7. Regardless of how new a Chalet is, you may still find a spider in your bed
8. There are 325 different ways to photograph a raspberry tart
9. Mess with Benny Maccormack at own risk!
10. Never get sucked in by the voice in your head – know your limits!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.